The journey

She irritates 
An angry being
She cries out
To tell her story
He can’t understand
He’s just not
Made for it
The profound
The mystic links
She speaks about

The coincidences 
To him
They do not matter
But they do
To her
She wants
To understand 
He can’t take it
The accusations 
The doctor
He says 
Give her the pill
She refuses
She’s not the problem
That’s what she thinks
There’s no suicide
It’s not impulsive
A calculated one
She knows
The maximum dosage
That will help
Solve the problem
It boomerangs 
He thinks it is
An attempt
At suicide
He can’t let
His loved one
Or walk away 
Or die
He calls the doctor 
He tells him
The dosage
That she had
Told him
She won’t die
He assures
Take her
To a
Government hospital 
The neighbour arrives
The brother calls
Her parents consoled
Her brother checks
She will not die
The medicines
They’re not fatal
If only they knew
That she knew
That she wouldn’t die
That  she knew
What she’d consumed
Was well within
The permissible limits
You need to come
They say
She knows what coming
She surrenders
Emotions welling
In her heart
But calm
And quiet 
His heart is heavy
Trying his best
To stop the 
Tears welling up
He has to take her
There’s no other way 
No one wants 
This psycho
The private hospitals
Won’t admit
There they go
The government hospital
Two patients
To a bed
Their relatives
Sleep underneath
The doctors they
Are  overworked
She feels compassion
But there’s nothing
She can do
Maybe give
Some misplaced
Perhaps misleading 
Medical advice
It’s early morning
They have been shuffling
From department 
To another
And other reports
She gets to sleep
On a bed
With a nurse
There’s no doctor
Blood dribbling out
The saline drip
She writes
To the doctor   
But  then
Nobody does
If only they knew it wasn’t 
They’d have packed her off
With medicine
They’ve had no sleep
All three of them
The  mania sets in
They get a pipe 
The next day
To draw out the poison
She chokes with pain
She cannot scream
The pipe’s inside
He notices
Her tears
Stop he says
She calls the doctor
Get Anesthesia 
she says
They dip the pipe
In that numbing liquid
The pain is gone
The foul concoction 
Retched out
The poison probably 
Long gone
Now she’s back 
To another ward
No one gives her
Her medication 
The poor doctors
She’s dizzy
There’s no breakfast
A poor old lady
With two pairs of clothes
In the city
From a distant village
Seeking a cure
For her daughter’s
Undiagnosed illness 
She asks
She enquires
She’s not
Shocked to learn
I’m all alone
She brings it
A tiny box
And offers her
A large laddoo
She can’t accept
She’s sophisticated
She has to save
For her daughter 
No she says
You are my daughter 
She takes a bite
Is delicious
With homemade ghee
The poor has 
For once 
Helped the rich
He’s gone to find
A better place
She’s calm
That’s a mirage
The mania 
Is rearing
It’s ugly head
The senior doctor
With his interns
Giving them
A monologue 
About what
She doe recall
She goes up
And give her own
How vital it is
To store
Their medical history 
Give them a file
Punch their papers in
And keep a parallel
In the hospital 
In case
They lose it
They listen in silence
Their expressions blank
She heads out
Down the stairs
And walks out
With the strength
And confidence
Of the mania
Or is it 
Of the mania?
On the streets 
Cars buzzing past
She has in mind 
A place to go
An unfinished business
The direction
She doesn’t know
She crosses the street 
A couple of times
Trough the traffic
Buzzing past
At high speeds
She’s weak
Just a laddoo
In her belly
She stretches her arm
Trying to get 
Someone to notice
She has nothing
No money
No cards
No phone
No direction
Just her clothes
And her slippers
And her faith
She wants to go
Where she once worked
To ask for help
Not for herself
But for those
Kind old souls
Who cannot travel
As they can’t
Climb up those stairs
Of their crumbling 
Then a man
Stops his bike
I’ve run out
Of the hospital
She tell him 
The  truth
I cannot take you
All the way
I’ll drop you
At the crossroads
They talk about
Her motives
His life
And then they’re at
The crossroads 
Who he was 
She’ll never know
But he was 
She thinks
Human being
She walks a kilometer
And then
She’s there
The place 
Where she worked
She tried to go in
She’s stalled
By the receptionist
Here clothes crumpled
Her face full of dirt
Her hair unwashed
She meets a person
He’s all nice
And his colleague
She’s recently joined
The one she seeks
The one
She thinks
Can help
Is no longer there
She tries to explain
To that man in white
But her brain
Is a muddle
She begins to tell
A wrong story
He asks
For her husband’s 
She tells  him
Where he works
She tells him
His number
But stops midway
Shes not going
Till she finished
She came for
He is gone
To get in touch
With her husband
She’s talking
To her
She looks
And sees them
They’re smiling
At her
They’re his friends
She tells her
They’re here canvassing 
She replies
She knows
They’re been sent
To get her
I’ll take you there
To the boss 
You want to meet
It’s a suite
With a comfortable bed
She knows it’s a trap
The boss doesn’t operate
From this place
They will come to get me
She says
I’m going out
She walks 
She spots a friend
He’s due to retire
Glad to see her
He takes her in
She sees the door
Of the big cabin
Walks in excited
She’s happy
But wants to know
Whether they’re using
The software
She had developed 
She’s unbalanced
Rage sets it
She races out
A kindly neighbour 
Has called
Her husband
They’re all there
To capture her
She rants
She screams
Walks out
And shouts
About human rights
Call the police 
She barks
Like a dog 
Pushed to a corner
There they are
So many of them
The executives
They pretend 
Not to see
She’s psycho
She needs
To be take away
She doesn’t know
The Mental Health Act
Five or six
They manhandle her 
And off she is
In his car
Was he right
Was she wrong
Was she right
Was he wrong
Could this have been
Nipped in the bud
No one will ever know
Except HIM
Was it all
Just meant to be?
Thrice she was lost
But was sent home
By kind souls
Sent by HIM
From the streets
To her aunt’s home
To her home
From the streets
To her hospital
To her home
Back from the streets
To her workplace
To her home
Wasn’t it her 
Who told them
Her cousin’s name
Wasn’t it her 
Who told the sister
About seven hills 
Who told him
Her workplace
Wasn’t it her
That told him
Her husband’s contact
Why did she tell?
Was it because
Deep in her heart
She still wanted 
To be back home?
Was it because
The Spirit in her
Showed her the way?
Was it just
A coincidence?


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